Brooklyn Girl

Okay-I am new to this blog thing but I thought I would give it a try. I am feeling old today. I am not sure if this feeling was brought on by Remington’s mission call, Richard starting junior high or going to a brunch this morning and realizing that I don’t know very many of ladies at church who have young children. The fact of the matter is I am not even 40 yet and having felt young for so long-the last 20 years-I think age is now catching up with me.

We had some church families and neighbors over for a Labor Day BBQ on Monday. Towards the end of the evening I was standing in the kitchen with 2 friends from church and 2 neighbors. My next door neighbor said to her next door neighbor, “Have you ever seen the picture of Stephanie and Sid in the front room?” “NO-let me go get it.” (It’s the picture of us at Curt’s wedding) She brought it into the kitchen and said, “Stephanie-you look like a Brooklyn Girl in this picture.” “Louise,” I said, “What is a Brooklyn girl?” “A Brooklyn girl is a girl who is fashionable, like a model.” Wow! I was flattered-I have always loved that picture. Then she said, “It doesn’t look anything like you now.” Thanks! She didn’t mean it like it sounded I know. Let’s face the facts. That was 20 years ago and since then I have had 4 children, moved about 10 times and weigh a lot more. Oh well that’s life. I am still young even though my kids are getting older.

Yesterday we opened Remington’s mission call. By the time 6:00 finally rolled around a myriad of emotions were rolling about in my head and stomach. It seems like the call took a while to reach our house, even compared with other calls to this area. That really added to the suspense. Plus watching it sit on the counter all day while we stared at it hoping it would magically speak and tell us of the call destination. I held it many different way and never once saw anything but white paper. I turned and twisted it several times but couldn’t see anything-not that I really wanted to anyway but I did it just the same. Then I suppose the normal anxieties appeared. What if he goes somewhere that he doesn’t want to? What if he isn’t excited about where he is called to? What if he goes somewhere war torn and dangerous? I knew I was not really worried about these questions but they did pop into my head once or twice during the day. My friend Annette who works with me at the FHC told me that you wonder and try to predict where they will go and then the call comes and you say, “of course, that makes so much sense.” That’s exactly how I felt-had I ever thought about Sacramento California? No?! Is he excited and thrilled to be going there? YES!!! It makes perfect sense-I can’t tell you why-it just does. I thought my heart was going to beat out of my chest when he opened it and started to read. Remington Riggs Bassett you have been called to serve as a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to labor in the California-Sacramento mission. Well of course he is-where else would be right for Remington? It was so thrilling.

As I lay in bed last night pondering the days events I felt like a firefly, glowing and flitting around. I couldn’t sleep and I needed to sleep. Remington had his call. He was going into the MTC in November and that couldn’t be more perfect. School was starting for the kids the next day. This was not our first school year so there would not be tears, lunch periods spent alone, confusion on school policies, and all the other things that come with starting at new schools. Finally sleep came and all too soon the alarm went off. I gave myself a big “beginning of the school year gift” and didn’t exercise but got up and showered and dressed for a busy day. I took the kids to school-all seemed excited. Richard torpedoed from the car like nothing you have ever seen. No more baby school for him as he said in the car last week. He was on to big and better things. Redford is never really excited about school but he seemed okay even thought he had a headache most of yesterday. Brittany had a big smile on her face, a cute new shirt and of course her cute self. Me? I usually feel sorry for myself on the first day of school, after all, it’s when I lose control and have to give my kids up to school work and the demands that follow. Usually it’s a “drag yourself up off the ground” and “put everything back together kind of day.” But, it couldn’t be. I had a breakfast to go to and now I am at the family history center. So, instead of feeling sorry for myself and feeling old-I didn’t-maybe I will do that tomorrow or maybe I won’t. It’s taken me years, since Richard started school full time, that’s 6 years ago, to come to understand the whole empty nest during the day thing. I still have a lot to do and kids at home but during the day they are gone and I miss them. But there is still much work to be done. The hard part about being a mother of young children is that you get used to it and then they get older. A mother spends so much time caring for small children, trying to accomplish so many things with children under foot that it takes up ones life. Now sometimes I look around at a quiet house and wonder where everybody is. Sometimes I sit in sacrament meeting with just one kid. It’s kind of strange. I know people at church who don’t know me wonder who I am, am I married, do I have kids? Yes to all! I am just at a new stage in life. Sometimes I don’t like it and long for the kids to be little again or to have someone around during the day. Sometimes it doesn’t like me, like when I seem to be doing something all day long when it doesn’t seem like I did anything. But I love my life and have definitely learned to roll with the punches so onto many more exciting things. Maybe the kids are older and need a different kind of attention, maybe I am getting older, maybe I have to get used to being alone during the day, maybe I can’t get as much done alone all day as I used to do at home with 4 little kids needing attention but oh well. You live and learn! I love my life and without question, I wouldn’t want anyone else’s life but my own.

Brooklyn Girl